Boy (you hurt me)

by OMGdanielle   May 18, 2006


So many tears I have cried so many times I have died so many lies that you told now its gonna unfold theres nothin left of what used to be there never gonna be another you and me it was your mistake making my heart break so I hope you regret cuz I wont let this continue dont hold your breath, boy, I won\'t be missing you.

(it actually sounds good if you say it like a rap, rather than poetically.)

~*~♥~*~

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by StormyStar

    Haha i really like this its cute lol and funny kinda lol or its just the way i think but anywho.. its cute 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Jenna

    I really like this...nice message and I can relate to it alot! great job!!! keep it up!

  • 16 years ago

    by Pete

    I really like the intense sentiment contained in so few lines. Really heartfelt and filled with what sounds a little like contempt for this person that you won't be missing.

    My personal opinion would be to add some grammar, as it is at the minute it's basically just one huge sentence. Possibly break it up a bit, i think it would help to get the emotion across. Most grammar indicates a pause, i think it would intensify the feelings with pauses for the reader to grasp whats being said.

    Overall great content though.
    With a little structural ammendment would be a 5.
    [4/5]

  • 16 years ago

    by Somber Esprit

    Yeah. it is a pretty good rap! i like it! i was surprised at how easy it was to read (i usually hate poems that arent spaced out properly)
    Great work!!

  • 17 years ago

    by ++*++jAsMiNe++*++

    I can really relate on this!! actually, i love this!!! anyway, keep on writing poems!! GO GIRL!!!

    -Jemimah Grace-

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