Kill the clown

by smile   May 23, 2006


Distance taken,
Walking through the door,
You shout at me,
But you don't even know me any more.

I changed you saw,
I lied you swore,
'it's all better now,
Here keep up that smile.'

I'm fake, I'm lost.
Forget the pain, Forget the lie,
Lose the smile.
I break down again.

Hand through my hair,
I rip at my roots,
Crazy antics,
I fall back and my mind is on a noose.

A tightly coiled rope passed around my neck,
Saving it's self to take away my regret.
Not only that but all thats wrong,
Every last thing,
I'm even running from a love song!

If only you could see,
But heavens know that takes too much hard work,
what with all the courage
And all of that honesty.

I'm a coward don't you know,
A deep desperate sole.
I walked down the street yesterday,
Listening to them shout 'hoe'.

I don't respect my body,
And they don't respect my mind,
Someone has to be used and they give me a line.

I sniff the coke,
Thats what they want me to do,
They take my body
Now do you see why my lifes a joke?

i sometimes feel that it is all getting too much. i go out far far too much, i get into dangerously intoxicated states, and i long so much for love and companion, i confuse it when guys take advantage of me. i hate it, but i can't see a way out? advice...

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by chris

    Definatly love the poem and the way you caught that feeling exactly,
    i have spent going on 4 years now going out as much as possible looking for the fullness of something that i found in the party world, being the cool party guy that everyone liked to be around is where i hid myself. and from all of that it taught me who i was and just about everything i know. so dont get to frustrated with it, embrace it for what it is find the silver lining, i have a poem life of a wino, but there is a line in it,"theres always alot you can learn about yourself with a bottle in your hand" i dunno sorry to life story you but its like 6 am and i cant sleep and i felt like a life story, but just get comfortable with yourself and all of the other bullshit goes away. hope all is well.

  • 17 years ago

    by livingwith

    Thats so powerful, you can talk to me anytime, leave me a comment if you want my email, i may not have ansers but i am a ear, and we can see what ideas come up from there alright

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