Watch me trick you

I'm tricking everyone now,
Do you want to know how?
Well lets see,
First of all look at me,
Don't i look happy to you.
I know I do,
Well inside,
My feelings like to hide,
They come out when no ones around,
Alone at night the want to be found,
They get sick and tired of hiding all day,
So at night there I lay,
In tears,
Crying in fear,
In fear of living my life,
That's usually when I pull out my knife,
I cut my skin,
Until the blood seems thin,
Harder and harder I try,
I try my best to die,
But its really hard to go through with it,
I know my mom would throw a fit,
Because she doesn't see my pain,
Or have these voices making her insane,
So this life is what I hate,
And tonight I'm making a brand new fate!