Leave My Mind

The crimes I commit,
Though salaciously delicious,
Bother my heart,
My soul, my conscience.

Thought I know the wrong,
I continue the deed.
My intelligence I ignore,
My desire instead I feed.

Can't help but think
The past's occurrences,
Funny how wildly
My demon dances.

"God makes me squirm"
Isn't good enough an excuse.
I sin on my own accord,
Thought I know it abuses.

Surprised I am, greatly,
That I'm still tolerated.
It pains me to know
She's not rightly appreciated.

What to do with myself,
I must learn self-control.
To uphold the left dignity in both of our souls.

For her, I must change,
No matter the cost;
To make her happy,
This habit must be tossed.

Yet no matter how hard
I force a new light,
My desire overpowers me,
I'm crushed under it's might.

My love is being clouded
By this thing called lust.
I must show her my love,
To not lose her trust.

It breaks my heart
Thinking of the wrongs I've done.
Though she doesn't stop me,
I know it turns her numb.

It breaks her heart
When I'm a "bad boy"
It makes her feel low,
Like just one of my toys.

This lust I must lose,
This conscience be cleaned.
I must do it quick
Before her patience runs out on me...