I'll never be fine !

Wow thats strong. its very good. take kare x x

Nice one very emotional poem and shows it's meaning deeply
keep the good work up
5/5

Awwwwww hun!!! this was soo sad, all your sacrificing for someone elses happiness. i absoutely loved this bub. well done

much love and many kisses,
bex

Dear Amelia,

Very impressive work. Some typos are previously pointed out by others, so I think you shoudl edit the poem and correct them.

Secondly, please do concentrate more on vacabulary and punctuation. The flow of the poem can be much better if you choose yoru words: Athough, And(&), are not ht epreferable words to begin a line with.

Teh below lines could have conveyes a lot more in terms of meaning and could initiate a lot of imagination in the reader if you will properly punctuate them:

I'll cry the tears
If it makes you smile.
Cuz all i ever wanted was for u to be happy
I just wanted you to smile
if me leaving is what you want
Its ok if i hurt all the while..

The Ending is nice, but I feel that this would be a fantatic work if it was split across two stanzas of 15 lines each, where the first stanza describes the hurt that you will endure and second stanza highlights how you are trying to cope with it.

Well, I hope I have not upset you. I do t mean to imply that this isn't a nice piece of work but only that it can be a lot better, it can be mindblowing.

Wow excellent.. i know exactly how you feel. 5/5!!