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by Drusus Bathory Mar 22, 2007
A monopoly of hate
A street I've seen before
I wonder lonely slowly tapping
Looking for a door
This bright light city dazzled me
It doesn't anymore
I'm almost out of cash
My trail at an end
Looks like I made a bad move
I'm off to jail my friend
Oh wow very original! you did an excellent job!
Yeah the middle para sucked! two lines just broke the whole thing up.
but i liked the rest. 5/5 David
The structure of this one is perplexing. The lines in the middle leave me to wonder if it is finished.
by N J Thornton
Monopoly as a metaphor, interesting. Not sure what else to say as you didn't want comments (or you won't listen to them) and I don't want to waste my breath...