Fresh Air

by Startle Me   Jun 9, 2007


An elderly walks with his lovely cane,
Following into nature's engaging smell.
What a lovely day it has been so far.
Hopefully, God's test, he did excel.

The old man smiles in his sorrow
Knowing a baby will be born soon.
For every time a mother gives birth,
An aged man will hear death's tune.

Angels have been warning his dreams;
Cautioning that death comes near.
He has no regrets, no distress to worry.
For this elderly man will soon disappear.

From the back of his mind, he is troubled,
Due to lack of experience in such a way.
Since the man believes in reincarnation,
He will live again soon after he decays.

For now, he will walk down towards nature,
Smelling fragrance in his wonderful afternoon.
He will take pleasure in his lovely location.
As the man listens to death's serenading tune.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by eehcuhhhz

    Well done :]

  • 16 years ago

    by C P Sharma

    The flow, the diction and the development of the theme are superv. Loved it.

  • 16 years ago

    by Danielle

    Wondrful. you turned a very "sing-song" kind of rhyme scheme into something beautiful.
    i love the theme of death and rebirth as well.

    wonderful!

  • 16 years ago

    by Lisa

    Wowamazing write
    keep it up
    -Lisa

  • 16 years ago

    by Tammie

    Original, and I like it. The flow was flawless, with a good range of vocab and rhyme. The ending really summed this poem up well, I like that you didn't have him die, just hear deaths tune. A very well penned piece. 5/5

    Tammie

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