Kismet

by .K.i.T.t.Y.   Jul 1, 2007


Temples line the horizon,
As Mother reaches forward,
Grasping the spirits looming around,
As she fades from this world.

Silent strength holds on
Resisting the urge to leave
All she has come to know,
Her human life.

With clouding eyes deep,
She stares me wisely in the eyes
For the last time,
And she whispers to me...

"My daughter, my sunshine,
My moon and stars,
Listen to me this once,
And follow it through.

"There's a spirit that dwells
Around our family,
His name is Kismet,
And he's here to take me away.

"He's watched over me,
And he will to you,
Overseeing everything,
Even mistakes.

"Baby, be aware of your time,
And what you do,
Because the worse you do,
The sooner you'll meet him."

***
Holding my breath
I watch this spirit take
My one and only love,
My sweet, darling mother.

------
Eck, this is horrible!

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

    Silent strength holds on
    [[I like that line a lot. It describes so well.]]

    Now. With all due respect, this is pretty bad. However, the beginning is wonderful. It's the part about the spirit that makes it four year oldish. =/.
    If you were to enhance that in someway, or just completely take it out, it would be a five poem.

    xTheEcstasyofSuicidex 3.5

  • 16 years ago

    by Independence Forever

    Great poem! nice and simple with a little complexity to shake it up. in a nice format, good pacing. great job

    your servant:
    david

  • 16 years ago

    by Stephanie Naylor

    It was very intersting, i dont like poems about life and nature, but i did like it, so nice job, and it had a good flow and i liked te way it was set up, 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Goran Rahim

    Oh, another good one dear, and the title catch my attention as Kismat is a persian word which means Luck, so it it what it means? please privete message me,lol

    another 5/5 from me

  • 16 years ago

    by Melpomene

    First off I want to say that the title really caught my eye. Not many people use the word such a kismet I don't think they know what it means but really interesting. The only minor thing that needs to be changed are these â?? things a commen error that happens on the comp so nothing major. I did not to find this to be horrible what so ever it really caught my attention. Because of the title I pictured this in an idian scene I don't know if that was what you were going for but the imagery seemed so vivid to me. Well done with the an enjoyable read. ~mel

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