Comments : The One Eyed Beast

  • 14 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    Oh, I found this somewhat amusing =D
    I love the way you wrote this, definitely has an effect on the reader, and it made me smile.

  • 14 years ago

    by Leanne

    I'm sure i've read this before, have you re-posted it? Or have you wrote one similar? I definately remember reading one of our explicit poems which i found hilarious then i couldn't find it a few weeks later when i tried showing it to somone.
    Anyway if it is the same one still made me giggle just as much as the first time round lol.
    Brilliant p[oem!!

  • 14 years ago

    by Melpomene

    This was quite amusing to tell you the truth. An effective piece with a nice flow and great word choice. Something different and great. Really interesting to get the reader hooked with it. What more can I say to this then well done on writing such an entertaining explict poem.~mel

  • 14 years ago

    by Marc Ortiz

    Hahaha! I love it! Simply amazing! I can really picture it in my mind ^_^ It was like watching a movie xD The opening stanza really grabs the reader's attention. And the ending was superb! ^_^ I love it *One of my Favorites*

    A perfect 5/5!

  • 14 years ago

    by Michelle18

    Oh my freaking gosh...that was ..WOW..omg.. i loved was amazing. you have talent just like you said in your profile...i think after reading this you might be in my great poem!


  • 14 years ago

    by Debbie


    I know for certain that I'm not allowed to read this particular theme. But I'm afraid I find it quite entertaining to read; in fact, the way you've written a lascivious and malevolent interaction in such a vivid, humorous approach humored me exceedingly. Its technical aspects are above reproach...Fantastic...Amusing to say the least. Keep on writing what you feel and like, hehe. I hope you all the best and take care. 5/5 ~Marian

  • 14 years ago

    by Molly Elizabeth

    LOL very good! Made me laugh, but also just written very well!! Honestly... IDK how you even go about writing a poem like that... so well done! Keep writing... your poem was very entertaining... and well... now I definatly plan on reading more of your work! Take care :-)

  • 14 years ago

    by Birgit

    I think the same a Marian, I'm not supossed to read these kind of things. ^_^ But I really could laugh at this =P Good job. =)

  • 14 years ago

    by Fsams

    Later, I pull out the one eyed beast,
    And push her head down south,
    As she opens wide for the feast,
    I shoot the magic in her mouth.

    Wow hahahah lol * falls on the floor guffawing*

    This is great great and I cant stop laughing. Wow nice , simply superb. Flawless and worth of 1000 comments. 5/5 all the way. tc

    Just correct the spelling of "than/then"


  • 14 years ago

    by silvershoes

    Haha, how incredibly...NOT sexy. This is funny and unexpected. 5/5 for effort!

  • 14 years ago

    by ImNotPerfect20

    I thought it was really good.. Although i dont normaly read these kinds of poems. Anyway keep up the great work and this is going to get a 5/5 from me becaue i thought it was that funny!

  • 14 years ago

    by Goran Rahim

    Hahahahaha what a detail , lol

    exellent job as everyone else said, you are right, u got a mad skill with pencil,lol.

  • 14 years ago

    by JaMeS

    Lmfao that was hilarious i know its a serious poem but that was skilled man top marks!! lol

  • 14 years ago

    by .K.i.T.t.Y.

    Oh wow. i dont usually like explicit poems, but this one was nicely done, poetically. the only thing i think you should fix is the word thee. to me it's just random. use another word if you want.

    [[ps i saw that you were on and decided to check out one o your poems.]]

  • 14 years ago

    by Natalie

    That's def. funny ...and so true to how a lot of people feel. i love how it all flowed together so well too. good one.

  • 14 years ago

    by rubi valentine

    Datz wat it do tell everybody else stop hatin on you and do yo thing Mz. Rubi Red

  • 14 years ago

    by Cassie Cain

    Good poem

  • 13 years ago

    by ilovenicole

    Rofl that awsome.

  • 13 years ago

    by Grace Delight

    That was quite an amusing poem. the flow was quite good and it definitely put a smile to my face lol

  • 13 years ago

    by Romantic Lover

    Many have said this was amusing. I have to say it was amazing and I'll PM you to tell you why. Haha!