Just Like You

by Michelle18   Aug 23, 2007


I could tear your heart out,
And stomp it on the floor.
Shred it to tiny pieces,
Until its not together anymore.

Scream and yell nonstop,
Everytime somethings not done right.
Slap you just a little,
To give you a fearful fright.

Call you nasty names,
And giggle as you cry.
Say how much I dont need you,
And wish for you to die.

But once you go to leave,
Beg for you to stay.
Tell you that it was wrong,
For me to treat you that way.

I'm sure this is sounding familiar,
Reading every line is probably making you sick.
You know I could be just like you,
But then I'd just be a d**k.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by HOLLYWOODxBANGBANG

    I loved this one as well, one thing I found though is you need to check your grammar over. A few words in your poem were missing grammar.. "something`s" and "don`t" . Other than that there was just one other thing I found, in the line.."beg for you to stay" should there be an "I" at the beginning of that? Anyways, besides those things you did a really good job once again. You`re still young..but you got a really great talent.

    "I could tear your heart out,
    And stomp it on the floor.
    Shred it to tiny pieces,
    Until its not together anymore."

    ^^ LOVE that stanza.

    5.5
    :]

  • 16 years ago

    by Nix

    I like every stanza except the last one because it isn't too effective. Anyway this poem has good flow and atmosphere is great.

  • 16 years ago

    by Adelle

    A very well written poem showing a lot of emotion and some good imagery I wasn’t sure about the way you ended it but over all it was good.

  • 16 years ago

    by Wintersolstice

    Nicely written, like the way it is directed at the person to try and make them see how they have been behaving. Flow isn't bad either.

    xxx

  • 16 years ago

    by lish

    I can sense u felt angry when you write this poem but its very well written and ilove it
    xx

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