Curse Cupids Aim...

by ABake   Jan 9, 2008


Caught up in a world of misery, I don't know the color of my eyes,
Hun, I could've sworn you were real, what a lovely disguise-
My heartbeat in my ears, on your mark I am ready to run...
I feel oh so stupid right right now, darling I really thought you were the one;

They always say what is meant to be will always find it's way,
Well, I haven't seemed to find ours, I'm speechless, not a thing to say...
Tears hit my sheets and as always my Ipod is one repeat;
I am overcome with pain, suddenly I feel a horrible amount of defeat.

I pray every five or so minutes, please tell me it is not true,
You truly had me fooled, sweetie I actually [believed] you-
The tub of Ben & Jerry's shows the world my heart is once again broken;
Caution tape and tears, I still left my only vulnerability wide open...

So love, tell me what were the color of my eyes,
Go ahead, read it again, I said were, meaning before all of your lies;
A million memories still remain in this Kodak picture frame-
Oh how I wish Cupid was either dead or not blessed with perfect aim;

They were right all along, you are just my latest dance hall drug;
Who would of thought [I] would get addicted, desiring even a hug,
The pain I feel inside, I can not quite put a shaky finger on it-
I've never felt so low before, I'm burning at the bottom of a fire pit...

No matter how many times I try to let go, honey I just [cant]
Truth be told, them dance hall drugs are worse then they look.

    report violation
0


Did You Like This Poem?

Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Melpomene

    Curse Cupids Aim...

    The title of this piece definitly caught my attention. I loved it very much. Wow this poem was incredible. I really enjoyed every single line of this poem. From start until finish you portrayed so much emotion. The imagery from your description was fantastic. I could picture a girl laying on her bed with an ipod. I do believe I'm like that alot of the time. I cant find a favorite part from this piee, it was all fantastic and perfectly written. Your grammer punctuation ect is spot on. Your word choice simple yet effective painting a smooth flow through every line.

    "So love, tell me what were the color of my eyes"

    I loved that line, It held so much bitter sweetness. It truely caught my eye.
    Overall this was another fantastic poem by you. Keep on writing so that
    I can keep on reading your amazing poems. You have talent sweetie.
    Well done. 5/5 ~Mel

  • 16 years ago

    by NyellMoonlight

    This poem is greatly written, filled with very intense emotions. The imagery that you created is very vivid and whole piece is deeply touching.
    I don't understand the function of the few words in the brackets, but maybe that's just me... I didn't like the ending line because it lack intensity of the rest of piece and that's the only place in the whole poem where the flow seem disturbed.
    All in all you did a great job with this poem. I could feel everything that you described through the piece like my own feelings.
    My favorite stanza is:

    - So love, tell me what were the color of my eyes,
    Go ahead, read it again, I said were, meaning before all of your lies;
    A million memories still remain in this Kodak picture frame-
    Oh how I wish Cupid was either dead or not blessed with perfect aim;-
    ^^
    Original and deep.

    Keep up!
    5/5 from me

  • 16 years ago

    by Blissful

    First off, I just loved the title, it captured my attention and I wanted to read more. The language you used really reeled me in and I could relate with everything you said.

    "Tears hit my sheets and as always my Ipod is one repeat;"
    ^I think you mean "on"

    "The tub of Ben & Jerry's shows the world my heart is once again broken;"
    ^this line was so simple but yet held an immense amount of meaning. The imagery here was flawless.

    The last two lines were a perfect way to end the poem. It tied everything in together beautifully. Well done *5/5*

  • 16 years ago

    by JustKristina

    I thought that this poem was pretty good. The meaning behind it was great!!!! I loved it! But at times the flow and rhyming just didn't fit. but otherwise it was awesome.. great poem, but it could become amazing with a little bit of tweeking.. :D

  • 16 years ago

    by BlAcK RoSe

    I like it. Different from other i have read. flowed well. Good work.

    BlAcK RoSe

    Please comment on mine

Read All Comments (5)

More Poems By ABake