I wish there wasn't this
confusion...

Another poem asking for the impossible.
Another night wishing you were here...

[Should I even share this?]
I am able to distract myself...

Do you stay up at night
thinking of our crusades...

Refuse the memories,
the knowledge of...

I've never had anyone leave me before.
I just thought you should know this...

I wish you'd held on for me,
and waited out my tide...

Just shy of
two weeks...

I delay the onset of the hurt
you unintentionally caused...

Randomly, I'll remember
bits and pieces of it...

What I miss the most
is finally feeling safe enough...

[trigger/content warning]
Waking up suicidal...