Where is the best place to get married really quickly without an

Lets say I had to leave my country and marry a girl I didn't know very well as quickly as possible. lets say she might be 17, where is the best place to do that? I can pay witnesses.

Vegas? Thailand?

Alcatraz. Levinworth, KS. Attica, NY.

Omg who ever wants to marry a 17 year old who they barely know

needs to go get an exorcism...

xoxo

Like I have a choice in the matter!

I need more options, not judgements!

I'm a broke student who needs 4500 bucks to pay off my school bill...you're paying? let's do this! I'm witness #1!

Stone the crows, $4500 just to watch me wed a crying 17 year old poet? I was thinking travel expenses and perhaps a few snacks...maybe a backrub once the whole sordid affair is over and I've sent her back home.

Sold!! I'm there :) airfare, food, backrubs...I feel like the bride here lol

'Omg who ever wants to marry a 17 year old who they barely know'

Hell... why are you making him break up with me?

Kevin, best place is Syria. We could live here the romance of being endangered together amidst a merciless war. Plus, I have an apartment of my own. No need to pay.

; )

Hey , hey now! You may put Kevin in danger because clearly he'd do anything for your love but dont endanger the witnesses!!

I have been arguing on youtube you can legally stalk a 17 year old kid under the guise of a neighborhood watch. Of course that topic is too politically controversial for this forum . Guns do not harm people just Dick Cheney and George Zimmerman.

He's not stalking me and I am not a kid! Watch out, ya'll.

You need to convert your religion first so you can have two wives, one over and one under 18! and that keeps options open for 2 more!

And you don't have to go anywhere trans-border, just contact these Imam's right where you live man:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2200555/The-British-child-brides-Muslim-mosque-leaders-agree-marry-girl-12--long-parents-dont-tell-anyone.html

(This is a humorous thread, so don't start raising your swords guys)

"He's not stalking me and I am not a kid! Watch out, ya'll."

I would like to lighten the mood of this thread before I offend the OP or his muse
If you would google the lyrics to ("My Back Pages") or youtube a song written by someone born with the name Zimmerman Bob Dylan ~ "I Was so Much Older Then..." ("My Back Pages") and critic the lyrics I will critique one of your poems
I no this is the wrong forum but it could inspire you to write a great poem

"Crimson flames tied through my ears Rollin' high and mighty traps Pounced with fire on flaming roads Using ideas as my maps "We'll meet on edges soon" said I Proud 'neath heated browAhh, but I was so much older thenI'm younger than that, now
Half-wracked prejudice leaped forth Ripped down all hate, I screamed Lies that life is black and white Spoke from my skull, I dreamed Romantic facts of musketeers Foundationed deep somehow Ahh, but I was so much older thenI'm younger than that now
Girls' faces formed the forward path From phony jealousy To memorizing politics Of ancient history Flung down by corpse evangelists Unthought of, though somehow Ahh, but I was so much older thenI'm younger than that now
A self-ordained professor's tongue Too serious to fool Spouted out that libertyIs just equality in school Equality, I spoke the word As if a wedding vow Ahh, but I was so much older then I'm younger than that now
In a soldier's stance, I aimed my hand At the mongrel dogs who teach Fearing not that I'd become my enemy In the instant that I preach My existence led by confusion boats Mutiny from stern to bow Ahh, but I was so much older thenI'm younger than that now
Yes, my guard stood hard when abstract threats Too noble to neglect Deceived me into thinking I had something to protect Good and bad, I define these terms Quite clear, no doubt somehow Ahh, but I was so much older then I'm younger than that now"

Read more: BOB DYLAN - MY BACK PAGES LYRICS

Georgia Whiting sings, "My Back Pages"
I like the way this chick does it

ALS, I dare you to make a post for ONCE without a link, or an offense to Islam or a hint that you're joking.

Noura totally stole my "ya'll"

So I am using peasants from now on!

^^So is there a censorship on humor as well in Islam?

Did you know that Christianity and Hinduism were that way, and in the 1800's the youngest girl married was age 4 in Christianity! The difference Christianity moved in to the 21st century, and Islam has remained in the 15th.

Light up with your threats. You are always trying to belittle or insult people 2-3 times your age. If you don't get the humor, don't threaten. Leave your angst behind. Just because you don't know me, or don't appreciate what I say, does not give you the right to pounce on everything I say with words like:
"Lonely Something, I am rude when there is a reason to be. When someone so vague and so humor-less posts epics about stuff they definitely have no idea about."

Sure, I do feel sorry for a 17-year old trying to pretend she is a wise 40 year old.

Islam has remained in the 15th.

^ I just ADORE how you think you know everything, David. In fact, you know nothing... bcz... you can soak your wikipedia in hot water and drink it raw... ;)

If you don't live in Islamic communities, you won't know a thing.

And hey, there are 29824242342523452334245233 Islamic communities... So you might go to Lebanon, Syria, Iraq, Oman, Morocco, Egypt, etc.....

and UNTIL THEN, you can SPEAK.

You always generalize. And I feel sorry for all non-Muslims who believe what you say 100%.

I just don't find any humor in your posts.
Even though you claim so.

Poetess You know Kevin has his own band
I would like to see him sing this to you

http://youtu.be/0k6mQyu2GxM

below is what Cat looks like now
http://youtu.be/gLG91tOLPdQ

Oh my, hahaha. You really are ALS.

Michael, you always make me lol.

"So you might go to Lebanon, Syria, Iraq, Oman, Morocco, Egypt, etc.....
..and UNTIL THEN, you can SPEAK."

^
Is that another one of your threats LP? A carry on from the other thread and the comment on my poem.

First the brother, then the sister, then the brother again, and neither know how to apologize to people they trample on, or write directly offensive comments with a personal touch.

If you can't see what is humor and what is real, then why comment?

I am not participating in this fruitless war of words. But, be warned, belittling a person is not acceptable standards of communication. I don't belittle you or your sister when I speak, never have, so use mature language when you disagree on forums on anything, as a matter of minimum courtesy to a fellow member.

Thank you
"Wisdom ceases to be wisdom when it becomes too proud to weep, too grave to laugh, and too selfish to seek other than itself."
Gibran

A big LOL.

Where did you see a threat in what you quoted from me?

* I used to respect you so much. But now, NO. You're the type of people that smart talk much. But on me? Hell No ;) I'm immunized against your smart talk that's humorless. I see no point of your posts that make fun of other religions. Or when you talk so confidently about Moslims, appearing like a Physics teacher explaining a simple theory of Mechanics to Grade 1 students.

People are smart enough not to believe everything they hear. And believe me, you are a threat in this website. Another Wikipedia that is not credible by any means.

"You need to convert your religion first so you can have two wives, one over and one under 18! and that keeps options open for 2 more!"

I don't want to offend anyone with my opinion but if we all looked deeply into the heart of the OP we could find the humor in Kevin committing to anything, or at least the Kevin that has given me the impression that he despises anything to do with religion. That in my book includes holy matrimony

HEY
This is a humor thread - keep it light.

No flaring nostrils, no flailing crimped fingers and no accusation that anyone would ever take anything on this site any more serious than Michael's youtube links.

Thank You
here is one that will totally PO the OP

http://youtu.be/J-QXWOAdQIE

I think I will shock Kevin by quoting an atheist

Life is too important to be taken seriously." Oscar Wilde

I disagree with everyone in this thread except Kevin, who has his priorities straight. (Kev, you might have trouble in the U.S. without guardian consent. I'm not sure.)

This isn't a time for arguing about Islam, or bringing arguments up in a "joking," but really transparent, manner. But neither is this purely a humorous time. This is a time where we put those tiny issues aside and discuss what really matters, such as the fact that people are only voting for writers who are A. Their friends. B. In their club. C. On their favorite's lists. D. Used to be in a club, or E. Talked to in the forums.

I'm confused and also amused. Kevin you are my favourite

LP, I don't wish to post any more responses to your continued belittling.
But, you have me really offended now. I have never disrespected you or your art or your talent...go find a comment anywhere directed against you.

Yet...this will be the third time you have directed more than a personal insult at me.

Read your own posts from this thread alone:

"'You're the type of people that smart talk much. But on me? Hell No ;) I'm immunized against your smart talk that's humorless" .
. ..what am I supposed to think of this one?

"Or when you talk so confidently about Moslims, appearing like a Physics teacher explaining a simple theory of Mechanics to Grade 1 students. "

...First it was the comment on my poem, comparing it to a 4-year old's composition, now I am like a Physics teacher explaining Mechanics to Gr. I students??
....So we are another 3 notches below the 4th grade now! And where did I explain Islam? I just asked qns about what is written in the holy text to why "Buddha was beheaded" or why we have this new breed of terrorists everywhere, threatening the very foundations of World Peace. No one answered those? did they?

and now you have to say with your infinite wisdom ..."And believe me, you are a threat in this website. Another Wikipedia that is not credible by any means."

....So I am a threat to this website??? Wow! And I am supposed to take these insults from you, foul mouthing your way, with your little sister following in the footsteps....

(Hey, Kevin...hate to pollute your humorous thread with this response, but I wish I had a choice. I can take personal insults only so much, I am no Buddha or Mahavir)

Sorry, looks like 2 people posted before me simultaneously as I posted mine.
---------------------------
And Mike, enjoyed your links.

My latest info, ALS, say that those Buddists/Hindus are the ones who are beheading Moslims in Burma (aka Myanamar). I wonder why no one mentioned this. Especially YOU. Since you always keep us updated.

LOL... and they claim Buddhism/Hinduism is glossing with humanity.

Abed & David CHILL!

Sibs, pass me some of that whatever it is you're on. I may have to take off work early today.

You guys are killing the engagement party. Start your own thread.

And if I get an excuse like "I couldn't help but respond, I was driven to it" I'll send you to your room like a four year old, because four year olds are the only ones who have no control over their actions (although even they know how to hold their sh*t in, by that age).

Can't we keep religion away, seriously, David perhaps you did not mean harm by your comment, since everybody is being somehow sarcastic, but you are older than us, no ? and if you have felt and actually since it is obvious that religion is a sensitive matter why do you keep making jokes about Islam when you know it WILL offend someone ? like specific someone(S) ?? just wondering, because this keeps happening over and over again, not just an innocent joke that passes by, it somehow looks like you do it on purpose whenever you find the apportunity.

I don't want to be unfair, as I did not say a word about the content of your post, you are free to say whatever you want, as long as not crossing a line,but even when using polite words, we can be disrespectful and that's what you usually do.

you are supposed to be wiser than us, and so why do you keep trying to push younger Muslim members to say something you feel like "insulting you" by making jokes about their religion in any way or form.

I don't think it's right for someone your age, you don't like what they say, when infact no body ever target you when you talk about anything different, open your heart a little bit, and make an attempt to stop using your sarcasm against others beliefs, why do you expect them to accept a humorous insult, when you yourself will not accept one.

I'm sorry, Sib.
Maybe ALS can control himself better because he used to hold it in when @ 4 years of age. lol

I was a bedwetter that time. You need to excuse me. I never held it in ;)

Kevin you can get married in Lebanon, we have amazing outstanding places for honeymoons :P
you can also have a honeymoon without marriage or a wedding TADA ...come over:P

"you can also have a honeymoon without marriage or a wedding TADA ...come over:P"

Whoa now, Nana. Let's keep this thing official, shall we?

Hahahaha yap, Shall we dance :P

you know like picking a small house at the cedar mountains, or beneath the sea, or in any other hotel that views both snow mountains and the shore from afar, there is a bit of snow at this moment, enough for a romantic honey month :P

Snow!
Bet it's nothing like the snow Zhivago & Lara had in their love nest in Siberia.

Lebanon does look beautiful. I like places that aren't flat!

Hahaha well Larry, it never gets TOO much, in middle east " Lebanon" it's always in between, since we have 4 seasons. Never too cold, never too hot. However global warming is f..ducking up the weather :P

And YAP very beautiful XD and very small

Lebanon goes like this, from east to west:

Dry Mountains - Green Flat Land - Snowy Mountains - Populated Flat/Rugged Lands - Shoreline - Mediterranean Sea!

:)