Sometimes Beginnings arent so Simple.

by Finalgravedigger   Oct 23, 2008


"Sometimes Beginnings aren't so Simple."

Prematurely born in the crater of desecrating reality.
Before eye lids open this child's mind knows thriving brutality.
Helpless and shrieking from the pain of attempts to crawl.
This little baby is wrenched by life's basic barbaric brawl.

Drenched and engulfed by knowledge that many cant obtain.
Slowly this ones morals shall form from the gift of pain.
Vitality is up to one's will and ever pending strength
Fighting at the beginning will widen life's fickle length.

Twisted, wrapped and tied by society's sinful wrath
Forming and generating a horrid yet mysterious path.
Breaking and holding on to what seems to be possibly sane
This obscure start could drive most to be impotently in vain.

This horrid beginning should be forbidden in the human race
Hardly prepared many die without leaving a speck of trace.

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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by Second to None

    I love your vocabulary.
    every single word choice was perfect!

  • 15 years ago

    by TorturedTourniquet

    This is very well done. The word choice is fantastic. Personally, as I can't use large words most of the time, I found this really touching considering I couldn't do something like it myself. Nice job.

  • 15 years ago

    by ghosts in bloom

    Your word choice and flow really [wowed] me in this piece. Your style as I have gathered is really intriguing to read. Every line in this seemed to ooze very powerful and sincere emotions. I really enjoyed the story portrayed. I was a bit confused about the wording on the last line though, "speck of trace" ... it would make more sense to me as "speck or trace," but that is just a suggestion. Otherwise, I think this piece is incredibly strong. You have a knack at writing powerful couplets I have noticed (; Makes the form really end with a punch. Great work, keep it up.

  • 15 years ago

    by Blissful

    You seem to always have such a flawless word choice and flow in everything you write. It makes it so much more interesting to read when everything is so smooth and well put together. I could just feel the deep and powerful emotions you were expressing and the darkness beneath it all was mind blowing. You truly are a rare talent. You kept me interest from beginning to end telling a tale full of meaning. Thank you for sharing.

    Well done.
    *5/5* :]

  • 15 years ago

    by Ciara

    Wow that was very stong and Emotional
    Thanks for reading my poems
    5/5
    Lots of love Ciara.....x

Read All Comments (18)

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