I'm being overly scrupulous here, but the capitalizations of every line is a smidge off-putting, I know it happens because of auto-correct (if only word-processors had a template for poetry and just stop auto-correcting and changing the format up, anyways I digress). The tongue-in cheek reference to goldilocks in the introductory stanza sets the theme of the poem up quite well; yearning. The old woman yearns to comfort others, yearns to live (both in the literal and metaphorical sense) until the yearning is no more
This is a truly sad yet beautifully written piece. Your descriptive and structure make it most enjoyable to read.
All the best, Em
1 year ago
by Ben Pickard
This is an excellent piece, written very delicately. I love the simile used in the first stanza comparing her mouth to "the local road (you) always walked."
The scatterings of parenthesis work nicely as well - I always feel they add to the delicacy of a poem such as this.