by silvershoes   May 17, 2017

I told them if I lose him too, I will die
Because these are the threads that bind me whole.

I don’t want to explode into a million particles
returning to the cosmos; returning to the earth,
But when I close my eyes, I see your body one-and-a-half feet underground,
and it’s starting to decompose.
It, not you. I can’t think of you like that.

I ask myself, how do I resurrect that which is not whole?

I would bloody my hands and tear the skin from my bones,
digging you back to life, sewing you back together
though you would snap like dust. Like stardust.

I would give this all up, watch it playback, erasing as I go,
pressing pause when I hit the day before I lost you.
This time when he asks, "Should we take them?"
I won’t hesitate.
I won’t let my silence speak for me.
I will answer a resounding, “Yes.”

I can’t know what stage in my life I’d be in now,
where, what, how, why, who,
but I would have you.
I would still have you.


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Latest Comments

  • 1 year ago

    by nourayasmine


  • 1 year ago

    by Em

    This tore my heart apart alittle bit more on each read.

    Much love

  • 1 year ago

    by mossgirl19

    I didn't know what happened, but the longing you have to bring the person back to life is so strong that I feel it as I read through. This is such a sad poem.

  • 1 year ago

    by Ben

    This is heart breaking and beautifully written.

    Great Job


  • 1 year ago

    by Poetess

    My heart breaks whenever I read about your loss. It's never easy and I'm sorry :(

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