Breaking Apart A Perfect Life

by Jessica   Apr 20, 2007


Tears of regret linger on fraying, pained skin
Millions of unheard wishes remain not given
Desperately trying to turn back the clocks
Praying to God that she will be forgiven..

Kissing him goodbye; fleeing with salty tears
Pulling her down slowly; guilt clings to her heart
An act of adultery and passion she has committed
A sordid crime scars; slowly tearing her apart..

Lying awake at night; tear filled eyes burn
Screaming echoes, throughout her fragile soul
Torturing herself inside; cutting open wounds
Falling deeper and deeper into an unfaithful hole..

Continuing to live life as if nothing ever occurred
Locking away secrets; no evidence does she leave
Battling her guilty lie; agonizingly killing herself
Into a perfect life, the dirt she carefully does weave..

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by HOLLYWOODxBANGBANG

    I love this, at some parts it was a bit off, but nothing too bad. The imagery was great, but try to refrain from using one word too many times in one poem..it throws it off. Anyways, I did like this, overall.

    5.5
    :]

  • 16 years ago

    by xxSnow Angelxx

    The poem started well and ended perfectly...It flowed smoothly-Perfect!
    The choice of words was superb and suited the poem and added to te beauty...Sad yet it was well penned!
    Good job!
    5/5

    xxPoojaxx

  • 16 years ago

    by Angel Of Death

    I love this poem, its sad but still really beautifully written, i love how you worded it and everything.. its brilliant.. keep it up ;)
    xx

  • 16 years ago

    by ASPHYXIATED

    Grrr.
    I had a long comment typed out but then my stupid signal got lost and the thing was lost.

    Anywho, I loved this poem. A lot.

    Its not often you see a poem that has described everything so great using the perfect vocab.
    It really made the poem stand out.
    Its not vocab you can't understand, like some poets use.
    But its not extremely simple and boring.

    Your stanzas were packed with words yet you never lost flow. Well done.

    I loved this ;
    "Kissing him goodbye; fleeing with salty tears
    Pulling her down slowly; guilt clings to her heart "
    Something about it really made me go wow.
    "Guilt clings to her heart" <- that was my favorite line I've read in a while.

    Well done =]

  • 16 years ago

    by dollwithafrown

    Ah, wonderful. It was so painfully sad, yet that was good - I always look for strong emotions being conveyed in a poem, and I certainly got that here.

    Nicely penned.