Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic

Your writing is so magical...it's breath taking...beautiful!

This poem is beautiful! You have such a way with words. It's seems so effortless and so natural. This poem painted a picture in my mind. I can see this woman doing her thing under the moonlight!!!

I always appreciate your kind words. I must apologize for not coming by here more often. I'm rarely on here and when I am I don't stay for long. With the system down at work I figured I'd take a minute to read some stuff....

:) Hope you have a great day!!!

Wow... talk about the lust that is hidden in this piece. There is strong desire that is screaming out.

Drumbeats repaint soul
with karmic, maroon and red ink
writing the night away, laughing,
as flowing attention heals wounds

^^ I love this verse.

Well done...

~~Sher

I really like this one and ia i read it (dunno if this is right) but the dancer really comes to life. great visualization in the words.

Okay first off, before I even read the poem, the title was very good. It draws the reader in, makes them curious. Well done with that. :]

Ashy glances behind laced veils
reveal inner thunders that crawl
wearing cloaks weaved with storms-
elegant body language whispers secrets.

^^ Once again your imagrey is superb. The third line was my favorite. I got this picture in my mind of an actual cloak made of storms. Weird, huh?

Music ignites motions, surreal-
moving across the moonlit floors
spinning within hues of outburst,
swirling with such passion and grace.

^^ It's like you're just stating thoughts or something. I think you're trying to tell a story, but it's not going to well. Maybe you're trying too hard not to put "I's" or "she's" in your poem. I agree that your shouldn't put a lot, but a few are fine.

Drumbeats repaint soul
with karmic, maroon and red ink
writing the night away, laughing,
as flowing attention heals wounds.

^^ I think it would soud so much better and make a lot more sense if you wrote the first sentence like this "Drumbeats repaint [the] soul" I think the rest of this stanza was really great though. It was descriptive, yet simple.

Fingertips glide down the body
hypnotizing traces of reasoning,
complimenting ardent silhouette
which sways amongst the stars.

^^ Eh, you're getting back into that complicated speach again. It really is beautiful to read, just a bit hard and maybe a bit fake. [if that makes sense]

Every little thing she does is magic,
dazzled by diamond fantasies,
with silver glistening within pupils-
elegant body language whispers secrets.

^^ This was my favorite stanza. It brought the whole poem together perfectly.

Good job.

Keep writing!
Cayce

Very ellegant poem. Yeah, I know, who uses the word "ellegant" when referring to a poem. I DO. And what I mean by it, is that the story told, the way of words, is very expert. Ugh, explaining this is hard. It was just very captivating. I loved every fiber of this poem. The title added much to it, making this girl sound like a goddess.

5/5 =)