I'll never show it

I lay here crying in my lonely bed. Only my pillow, pen and paper know how much i cry and how hurt i really am. But i refuse to show you. Refuse to let you get a rise out of me. While you're off with her in a loving bliss i sit here in tears cutting at my wrists. Both the blood and the tears fall so much anymore it's hard to tell the difference between them. But you'll never know because i won't let you see it. Go on being happy as can be. But you'll never be happy enough because she'll never ever be me.