The Only Light in the Shadow of Goodbye.

First of all,Ur poem made me cry because it brought painful memories into my mind and heart...It's so touchable from the title to the last word...

They walk to the end of the road entitled "Goodbye"
holding hands with a potent grasp,
yearning for just one more second together.
But the path is now coming to a quick close,
as the two are forced to forever let go.

It's the saddest Imagery I've ever read As Goodbyes are just like roads and moments that we never wish to end. Although they hurt anyway,we just wish to walk on that road till we reach no end...Ur choice of words in this stanza really rocks..

Unspoken tears slide down her cheek,
as the once vulgar uproar in the distance,
now remains a serene murmur.
From now on her life will change drastically,
for he is no longer with her, no longer in her life.

I like how u described what she feels inside and what she is going through and that everything wouldn't be the same...That was so deep..

This just doesn't seem legitimate to her.
She never thought this day would come,
that they would have to depart and walk their own ways.
But there's a first for everything, as they say.

Then U continue what she is thinking about but at the same time She is shocked bcoz it's not what things were supposed to be...So touchable

The two stop and let go of the delicate touch-
that will no longer linger, for now they are apart.
No more passionate kisses, no more lust,
silence and tears are all that reside.

I liked this stanza the most bcoz It's so true...
No more passionate,no more lust(It's how things end...When lovers say goodbye,Sadness is the only feeling that lasts..)

Illumination that dazzled radiantly everyday
is now gone... forever and has vanished.
All that exists in the night is gloom,
and two shattered hearts that once loved.

Well-written piece that expressed the eternal pain..

The only light in the shadow of goodbye,
is hope that the two will love again.
What they once shared, will never be forgotten.
It is permanently stuck within their hearts.

Ur poem is more than awesome...I loved every word U've written...
Great work
Plz keep it up5/5..

Amazing poetry. This is by far my favourite of yours. It makes me feel so empty and sad inside. It's so thought-provoking and you use amazing descriptive words, what a perfect choice of vocabulary to bring out the sad message within. Great, great work :)

Sole x

"They walk to the end of the road entitled "Goodbye"
holding hands with a potent grasp,
yearning for just one more second together.
But the path is now coming to a quick close,
as the two are forced to forever let go."

^^ I loved this as an opener. I thought it was really good, because it gave the reader an idea as to what people are feeling right away.

"Unspoken tears slide down her cheek,
as the once vulgar uproar in the distance,
now remains a serene murmur.
From now on her life will change drastically,
for he is no longer with her, no longer in her life."

^^ "as the once vulgar uproar in the distance,
now remains a serene murmur." <--- Those lines are absolutely PERFECT! They just add something that is needed.

"This just doesn't seem legitimate to her.
She never thought this day would come,
that they would have to depart and walk their own ways.
But there's a first for everything, as they say."

^^ I liked this, though I don't like the usage of "legitimate". Maybe it's just me, but it just doesn't sound right to me when I read it. It works, though. & it's only my take.

"The two stop and let go of the delicate touch-
that will no longer linger, for now they are apart.
No more passionate kisses, no more lust,
silence and tears are all that reside."

^^ In the first line, I do not feel as though the - is needed. I think it will work fine without it.

"Illumination that dazzled radiantly everyday
is now gone... forever and has vanished.
All that exists in the night is gloom,
and two shattered hearts that once loved."

^^ Whoa. The first line in this stanza blew me away. It was just so.. pretty. It made me think of glitter and shiny stuff, no joke. Haha.

"The only light in the shadow of goodbye,
is hope that the two will love again.
What they once shared, will never be forgotten.
It is permanently stuck within their hearts."

^^ Aw. How sad. This is so beautiful, though. Because it shows exactly what two lovers feel when they lose each other, in my opinion. I loved it.

Overall; I thought the piece was VERY well written, and you did a wonderful job with your word choices and whatnot. 5/5

``Briana

*tears* *sniff*
such a sad poem and i can relate to it... you expressed what i'm feeling right now.. i can never described how i'm feeling because no words will be able to define it.. but somehow i was able to relate of how u wrote this poem.. great poem! =]

This poem shows so much emotion and sometimes saying good bye is hard but we all got to do it. whether its goodbye to a family member a or a friend...And even relationship are hard to do...