Title: Very unique, it lured me in instantly.. not to mention that this poem was nominated, so I'm anxious to see how great it came out. :]
"Human expressions deformed
Sun shine void of warmth
Nothing comforts no more"
`A powerful beginning.. human expressions deformed is not something ive heard before.. so hearing it worded that way was great, interesting way of using deformed to described expressions. Secondly, the second line was great.. you didnt make it dull, you made it your own.. the usage of the word void was perfect here. Last line, however.. no more is not correct.. I think you meant to say anymore instead?
"Empty fields, misery grows
Open sores, life echoes"
`Awesome job on the rhyming, and how it isnt forced.. and not using normal words that rhyme well together.. it shows that you put more effort into it than most people do when it comes to rhyming. What a somber mood youve portrayed though, really nicely done making the reader feel the emotion that seeps through your words.
`Powerful word choice. I loved how the title was incorporated here.
"Tomorrow so far away
Pipe dreams fray
Nothing left to caress"
`Hmm, really unique.. and original. Pipe dream fray.. I liked the word fray here.
Strong poem nonetheless, I thought you did a nice job.