Here With Me.

by Courageous Dreamer   Jul 25, 2009


This poem was inspired by my avator.
Suggestion are welcome.

Standing on a balcony,
bound by gentle swaying
waters of the Pacific--
mascara-kissed eyelashes
are weighed heavily by
silent I miss you's

The morning breeze
tousles layered hair--
blinding weary eyes;
cloaking falling tears,
yet lips shape a smile
as I feel myself tangled
in your presence.

Your sweet voice echoes
among the loud whispers
of seagulls; although faint
and in the distance, I know
that you've arrived and I'm
no longer alone; You're here
with me. As I welcome the day
with arms spread wide...

I miss you molds into I love you.

1


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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Cindy

    Temps
    What a beautiful poem :)

    Standing on a balcony,
    bound by gentle swaying
    waters of the Pacific--
    mascara-kissed eyelashes
    are weighed heavily by
    silent I miss you's

    The imagery is great. Giving the reader a vision into the poem.
    The sadness and lonliness can be felt in your words.

    The morning breeze
    tousles layered hair--
    blinding weary eyes;
    cloaking falling tears,
    yet lips shape a smile
    as I feel myself tangled
    in your presence.

    It's hard being without the person you love. Yet memories can still bring some happiness.

    Your sweet voice echoes
    among the loud whispers
    of seagulls; although faint
    and in the distance, I know
    that you've arrived and I'm
    no longer alone; You're here
    with me. As I welcome the day
    with arms spread wide...

    Thinking about that person that is gone can still bring some comfort to your world.
    Great piece.
    Take care
    Cindy

  • 15 years ago

    by Jad

    Very good descriptive poem talking about your avatar Temps. You can feel the emotion in this poem and the flow is good. You have created a work of art and it seems that you have made no flaw with this poem. Best poem I've read in awhile and hope you continue the great work Temps. -Jad

  • 15 years ago

    by ghosts in bloom

    I really loved the way this poem read. A narrative moment, bittersweet & lovely. It's a great picture to draw inspiration from too. Funny how images move us so much, isn't it?

    "Standing on a balcony,
    bound by gentle swaying
    waters of the Pacific--
    mascara-kissed eyelashes
    are weighed heavily by
    silent I miss you's"
    ^I like that you used the word 'bound' there, it sucked me in, and is not used as often as captivating or something of that nature, though its meaning is just as strong and powerful. The ocean is something that binds us to it..it's so hard to turn away from. Loved the last bit too, there's a sorrow & longing there without physical tears. Beautiful.

    "The morning breeze
    tousles layered hair--
    blinding weary eyes;
    cloaking falling tears,
    yet lips shape a smile
    as I feel myself tangled
    in your presence."
    ^Lovely use of adjectives in this stanza. (: & the optimism at the end made me actually smile with this girl. How comforting the thought of someone we love can be, even when we're alone.

    "Your sweet voice echos
    among the loud whispers
    of seagulls; although faint
    and in the distance, I know
    that you've arrived and I'm
    no longer alone; You're here
    with me. As I welcome the day
    with arms spread wide..."
    ^Echos should be 'echoes' I believe. Adored that bit though 'echoes among the loud whisper of seagulls.' A beautiful image and sound there. The world is still going on around her, but she's listening to this voice.

    "I miss you molds into I love you. "
    ^A good ending (: Really enjoyed this piece, Temps. Very well written! Keep writing down the bones! x

  • 15 years ago

    by junet

    I like the way you describe. hehehe

  • 15 years ago

    by Angel Tears

    This is beautiful. The emotion was captured perfectly in the words. 5/5

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