Nostalgic

by Sunshine   Apr 20, 2011


I took my steps back,
and ran out of your life
because You,
have all the precise maps
to pull me to the very fast,
escaping beat of your heart.

And today?
I am longing to hear your voice,
although I dress like a foreigner;
believe me
I am
Homesick!

by: Rania Moallem

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  • 13 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    It's very difficult to stray from something we thought we knew and loved, or maybe we did all along. It also takes a lot of strength to be the one to say goodbye, to make that move and leave the other person despite the fact that they can tempt you to go back to them time and time again, but you won't allow that. Takes a lot of courage that most people don't have, I admire you for that. There's always those feelings that linger, and we have to learn to erase it all from our memory in order to move on, they are just a step in the process and a hurdle to overcome in our way to feeling better and moving on. I just loved how you said you were 'homesick' because it is almost like we see this other person as our home, or a sanctuary we felt happy and content with, so once we flee from it, it feels that way. There's just so much meaning behind the few lines here, gives off that nostalgic feeling most definitely. The title reflects the poem absolutely perfect. Beautiful but definitely a tint of sadness as well. I definitely know this feeling & situation you speak of.

  • 13 years ago

    by Jad

    A very emotional poem that speaks of love in a way that is very creative and also has a deep meaning to it when one reads in between the lines. The poem flowed easily and the structure was well built. Your description of things in this piece was also good as it gave me some imagery and the best thing in this poem I think is that you kept it short and to the point. I like how you are very open in this poem as it is easy to understand exactly what you mean and it i easy to know what you are trying to say as for no misinterpretation.

    I couldn't find one stanza that really stood out to me. I really liked this poem as a whole and I feel that both of the stanzas were needed in order to deliver a full impact of your emotions and to get your message across.

    In all, I really love this poem as it is not what you normally write but it is good to see you outside of your writing comfort zone and attempting new pieces with new emotions. Your poems are always filled with surprises and feelings. This piece is no different and is incredibly strong even for not being in your typical writing. Great job and keep writing.

  • 13 years ago

    by Britt

    This is one of those poems you read from long ago (famous poets) that really makes no sense unless you were in that moment and that time. The structure reminds me of that, and the beauty held here reminds me of famous poetry as well :)

    Third line first stanza you have "You" capitalized, I would make it a lower case you, grammatically speaking, unless you're intentionally making this person super important.

    I love the thought of the first stanza, it kicked poetic butt :) I love the idea of the map and coming/being pulled back to someone you once knew so well. Emotions here are strong and hard, and you'd be a fool not to notice them.

    That second stanza is where the heartbreak truly sang to me - it's the perfect thought of being masked, as if to say "I don't love you" but inside, you can't breathe because of the pain. This was beautifully, beautifully written!

  • 13 years ago

    by Yakari Gabriel

    Although I dress like a foreigner;
    believe me
    I am
    Homesick
    ^
    Gurl you da bestest thatsz what you is.

    Short,creative,straight to the point. What more can I ask for ?:')

  • 13 years ago

    by Acoustic Odyssey

    Beautiful, and heartfelt! Brings new meaning to the saying, "home is where the heart is." Maybe the heart is where the home is...another well penned piece.

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