Am I A loser, Or Something Else

by Captain Lonesome   Apr 29, 2011


When the time comes to fall or defeat
I feel my strength start to retreat
Years have gone by filled with sin and remorse
Now conviction implies its time to change course

To be stuck amidst a decision being made
While keeping your conscience in the shade
I try so damn hard but to no avail
If done by myself Ill surely fail

Its one thing to accidentally be lured into temptation
To thoughtlessly commit a passionate crime with out contemplation
But to willingly follow through with what will undeniably be
Cause for consequence that I will be suffering

These almost remote actions I chronically carry out
Leave little room for excuse with out a doubt
There clearly is a line firmly drawn
Between the two sides of right and wrong

But the line itself is quite thick wide
Things like serving justice are often stuck inside
A rage from deep within constantly bludgeons away
Continuously pushing in anticipation for the day

That brings the destruction of walls thats kept it contained
Then the evil that has taunted for so long will wish it had remained
For as the inferno is released the flame will start to scorch and sear
All of the evils that had tried for so long to bring pain and fear

I Will Fight what the devil finds amusing
Which the rest us find exhaustingly confusing

Until I find someone whose ears and heart to me theyll lend
This complex expression must come to its unexpected end
What could have been one of my most exceptional works
Now stops due to the dense solitude and engulfing loneliness that lurks

Theres more to say.. but not today..too much in the way..filled with pain,
And turmoil.. hearts begun to spoil.. compassions worth is toiled.. emotions coiled,
And scattered, soul tattered, body battered.. mind shattered,
And marked by devastation.. scarred by mutilation.. dead anticipation,
Feeling snared, and scared, reborn then torn,
Used, bruised, wrongfully accused, shamed, lame, help me tame
This fire thats not yet ready to come to full flame, it cant yet be shown
Perhaps I Am to be alone for now
But if somebody could possibly, willingly, and happily
Wish to at least acknowledge me i
am here, Conversation is free my dear
Dont hesitate, before its too late,
Please try!
Not just for I

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Latest Comments

  • 12 years ago

    by L


    Am I a loser, Or something else

    The millennium question, something everyone ask one day or another. But that same question comes to our thoughts at any point of our life.

    The poem was long, yes. I was tempted to read it because of the title and i just skipped it and read another one but the title kept luring me in.

    It was worth the read, your word choice was great. The flow too.
    You stated your point.

    This is without any doubt my favorite part:

    "I Will Fight what the devil finds amusing
    Which the rest us find exhaustingly confusing"

    The last stanza has so descriptive. It shows how you feel. and the way the words are scattered shows a messed. And that's how i depict you while i was reading this.

    really good, I hope that by writing this you are feeling better.

  • 12 years ago

    by MyaEve

    I am so astonished! I have read some of your poems, but this one I avoided. I don't know why I did but I did. So today I decided to read it.

    Now I highly regret avoiding this poem for so long. The title struck me as a slang.. which meant I made the assumption that it wouldn't be as hmm.. what's the word. It wouldn't be as "steady."

    My favorite verse would probably be the one that is short yet meaningful.

    The seventh verse was my favorite! The rhyming was so smooth, and the wording was amazing. When I read this verse I was simply amazed and didn't continue the poem after a few minutes. I could feel the emoticon and I really like that in a poem.

    As for the rest of the poem, it was intense.
    I loved it as much as the seventh verse, the rhyming was effortless, like you weren't even trying.

    Contine the loving writing!(:

  • 12 years ago

    by MyaEve

    I am so astonished! I have read some of your poems, but this one I avoided. I don't know why I did but I did. So today I decided to read it.

    Now I highly regret avoiding this poem for so long. The title struck me as a slang.. which meant I made the assumption that it wouldn't be as hmm.. what's the word. It wouldn't be as "steady."

    My favorite verse would probably be the one that is short yet meaningful.

    The seventh verse was my favorite! The rhyming was so smooth, and the wording was amazing. When I read this verse I was simply amazed and didn't continue the poem after a few minutes. I could feel the emoticon and I really like that in a poem.

    As for the rest of the poem, it was intense.
    I loved it as much as the seventh verse, the rhyming was effortless, like you weren't even trying.

    Contine the loving writing!(:

  • 12 years ago

    by Amreen

    The poem is long though but it is worth reading..!

  • 12 years ago

    by Sparkling snow flake

    I love the flow of this poem
    When the time comes you will not be defeated... You are a strong person!
    nice write!
    Remember Im always here to listen to you if you want someone to write too :)
    5/5

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