Love & Power

Dark & great 5\5 :)

I really like this poen but there are a couple of things I saw. First the title is okay but I personally don't think it goes with the poem. Titles are very hard to make though. I think you could call it "regret" because of the last line.

In the third stanza second line- I didn't love it. I didnt think "mess" fit. Throw might be better. But that's just me :).

Otherwise this poem is really sad and dark. The characters you made vivid. And I like the subtle double view point. Though you pinpointed the "abuser" you show the pain of the girl. In that it was well written. I liked the wording you used as well. Using sad words were great to get your point across and you did. Because you throw the reader right into the situation. The sadness is well used through out until the end. The last line holds a lot of power and hope :). It gives a feeling of regret and emptiness. Like you love her but when you push her too far you get what you deserve :). Very lovely write.

This is really great. I like the moral of it. it shows how people think they can control others because in their mind they're better than that person . So they treat that person like crap. great poem