Perfect body

Shes sitting down again
realizing her body is to weak to stand
its only been been 2 months without food
how could this have happened

shes on the outside of her own world
looking at it through protective glass
wanting something she could never have
a perfect body and she would be happy

purging binging
all memories so close to her
the scary feeling as her fingers press against her troth
gagging she cant breath
amazed at how far she can push them down pressing hard against her skin

day after day the same performance
the feeling of food revolting her
the want and need to rid her body of it
the same process night day and afternoon

reflections always haunting nightmares
the awful flesh that she wants to get rid of
ripping apart her skin
trying to take every trace of fat out of her view

weeks and weeks she continued
starving herself after puking and purging
lies coming from her mouth promising she had eaten
blankly staring at her friends eyes swearing
she had kept food down for a whole week none stop

they guy she loved
started to notice her ribs appearing through her clothes
cheeks bones more defined then ever
eyes sunk and hollow in her head
a black glow coming from her skin

no longer can she see her reflection
but the image imprinted on her mind
awful fatty lumps is all she could see
enough to make her sick again
but there was nothing left in her stomach no more food to be chucked

her fingers went down her troth as usual
but this time it was blood that came back up
incontrollable she started to panic
but it wouldn't stop
continuing to spill from her mouth

pain exasperating her arms numb
planted to the side of the toilet bowl
as more and more blood flowed
trying to stop it but every attempt worthless

her boyfriend had warned her
gave in and told her to be careful
to this day i don't know if she meant to
but she swallowed 3 packs of pills whole

her friends walked the long mile after the coffin
her boyfriend shattered blaming himself
heads bowed as they proceeded
knowing that now she has the prefect body she always wanted

© Copyright J.A.