Alone

The desolation oozes throughout this piece.

I like the structure you use and the freedom within it where you do not restrict yourself to a syllable count in every area, letting the words do the talking instead of the system.

I do feel you have more to say though, perhaps this is an edit where you removed a stanza or two, but that's just an impression.

Very solid.

Bret

Wow great structure, works really well to emphasise the words, i love the way ur work is so uncomplicated, it really shows skill and confidence in ur own writing xx

I liked this poem. its quite short, but you still managed to say so much. it also has good flow. 5/5

This style was interesting and original!!
I like the vivid imagery created as it draws empathy for the writer. The emotions are deep, a good descripton of depression.

Very cool and interesting imagery, the sparse prose made the descriptions even more stark -- I think it portrayed lonliness as well as it described it.