You Were My Favorite Fantasy

Holding myself weightless against the skyline,
I close my eyes and open them when I reach nine,
With my fingers open wide I pretend I'm okay,
As the stars in the sky continue to rot and decay.

And my white summer gown flutters in the breeze,
As I stand in the ice cold water up to my weak knees,
But I can see them together still, holding hands,
And he gets down on one knee, holding out a gold band.

Tears are streaming down her face as she says yes,
And he held himself against her, smiling in success,
Until he seen me standing there beside them crying,
And he watched me fade behind them, he took her, denying -

I was just another girl, nothing special to him at all,
And against this darkening blue sky I feel so small,
With no hand to hold and no heart to beat against mine,
So I hold myself weightless against the pink skyline.

I can see him in the clouds looking back down at me,
As I yell: "Is this what you wanted me to be baby?"
And he shakes his head in disappointment for me to see,
When I hit my knees and sigh: "You were my favorite fantasy."

-Jenna Elphick
May 30, 2007