My Anti-Suicide

I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
I force the blade down deep
Just so I can feel

I know you don't understand
I know you never will
I know I may seem crazy
But cuttings how I deal

Drinking's not my calling
Pills are not my friend
So I'll use this razor
Until the very end

You say cuttings so cliche
I do it for attention
But you know nothing about me
Did I forget to mention

My dad's an alcoholic
My mother doesn't care
I'm losing everything I've got
Now judge me if you dare

I wear a calm face
While inside I'm in disarray
So I use sharp objects
To deal with what comes my way

I put others before myself
Tending to their needs
Whatever makes them happy
I'll gladly do the deed

It doesn't matter if I'm in misery
As long as they're pleased
So I use razors
To put my troubled soul at ease

You probably think I'm insane
And that I want to die
But to tell you the truth
Cutting's my anti-suicide

CopyRight-AmberPalmer