Really Long Fall

Every once in a while
When I see your face
My heart starts to burn
And I feel out of place.

I long for a moment
To be by your side
But hush those feelings
That'd long been denied.

Every once in a while
When I meet your eyes
I know you can tell
Of yesterday's lies.

You can sense the pain
That I'll just deny
Along with the tears
They all know I cried.

Every once in a while
I wish things would go
Back to the sweet days
When I didn't know.

I liked it much better.
But it wasn't real
And now I must live
With the way you feel.

Every once in a while
I just want to cry.
cause sometimes it hurts
Though I really try.

The memories are there
In the back of my mind,
Pushing on out
For me to find.

Every once in a while
I wish I could scream
Yell so loud at you
For haunting my dreams.

For leaving me hurt
And letting me down
Not thinking ahead
And helping me drown.

Every once in a while
I'd like to share blame
And say it's your fault
That I don't feel the same.

I still want to cry
I still want to scream
cause I'm still falling apart,
Ragged at the seams.

You don't know what you did
Or how bad I'm bruised
I don't tell anyone
That I'm still so confused.

Every once in a while
A poem like this comes
cause I'm still tangled up
In the damage you've done.

I refuse to be told
I shouldn't feel this way
All those words you've got
You can keep stuffed away.

I don't care about the rhyme
Or if it flows right
I just want to say it,
Get it out for tonight.

Every once in a while
I still feel in love.
Sometimes I wonder
If I'll ever have enough.

I want it to be done
And I don't try to recall
But that was a love
With a really long fall.