Solitude

Wow...were you alive a few centuries ago you would contest with the best poets for sure.Hopefully,one day,I will compose poetry 1/2 as good ;)

Ok, so I was looking through your poems, and I noticed you had a lot of them written for people, or written based off a song. I wanted to find a poem you wrote, with no outside inspiration. The type of poem, you write for yourself. I stumbled across this poem, and I must say, I really enjoyed it.

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"I never thought to bathe in solitude,
Nor reflect a sigh into the starless night.
Echo for an echo; twinge for twinge.
Beneath silence I waited there, waited still."

^^ The first line alone, leaves the reader pondering the same question, and it sparks an interest for the rest of the poem. The second line fuels that curiousity a little more. The third and fourth line combined leaves the reader feeling alone. They are expecting more, and are ready to read on.

"I never thought to weep these tears,
Nor melt in Vincent's twisted oil sight.
His brush for brush; Sketch for sketch.
Then waited evermore, waited there alone."

^^ The second verse, like the first leaves the reader interested. The first line of this verse made ME think back to times I cried for no reason. I know there are a few times where I needed to, and it just happened all of a sudden. I liked the allusion of VanGogh, who was famous for many of his oil paintings. The third and fourth line again, leaves the reader feeling alone, as somber as the colours VanGogh painted with.

"Born under winter light, empty snow,
To heal while sun slips through the white.
Scarlet blush, lost scarlet blush faded soft.
But still I waited for the kiss, waited silent."

^^ The last verse had the readers 'waiting' with anticipation, wanting to know how this poem will end.

[Now, this is where I would make a small suggestion. The poem ended well, but the last two words did not do it for me. I thought it would read better if you wrote 'waited in silence' or 'waited silently'.]

Overall, I thought it was a fantastic poem. It left me wanting to read on line after line. The flow was very good, and the imagery was great. You definitely leave the reader feeling the solitude you felt when you wrote this.

Awesome job on this one Kaylee!

Great. From this poem I can tell that you are indeed a good poet and not just some kid trying to sound deep on this site when really they suck. You're great. You do poems I like which can be hard to do. Go you! :) A five.

Really deep, written from the heart. i enjoy your poems. add a little something more to this, dont take it as rude, i just wanna feel more. you are an excellent writer. one of me fav's!!!

I liked that allusion you made in the middle there,
really caught my eye, there's also such rhythm in this one, that feels pretty good, too.
A dark piece, yes, but "dark" does not replace "deep" ^_^ 5/5