Tonight i feel like drinking myself to sleep, ive pushed you away, and once again im depressed, what to do with this stupid life of mine. will you ever come back to me? ill wait for your call. .. .

Do I really have to do this in order not to be judged by my family? I'm just being Emily.

Why does it instantly make me a bad person for only expressing how I feel?

Every time i get my head above water it seems someone pushes back down again:(

It's not suicide I crave, It's relief.

I only drink late because i miss you and can't sleep alone anymore, i need something else, a drug to poison me to sleep.

I cant sleep soundly knowing ive upset you, make me cold so these demons dont bother me.

My only prayer is to never need someone as much as i feel about you. . the nights seem to drag.

DON'T JUMP

I feel like were in two different worlds, cause when I reach out with my most heartfilled intentions...my cries fall on deaf ears.