I was a disfigured fox,
disappearing into a fog of dead wood and winter,
when I stumbled across your clouded shores
with sunlight casting stars upon a perfect calm.
I hated you from when I first caught your scent,
thick on heavy air;
your musk was a sultry poison, and when we met,
it was your hidden character that made me drown
in my own sick longing.
I had another, as you knew, but you swept away the evidence,
never blind to the torment it bore.
Oh, I hated you; hated every long second lost to holding your dark gaze,
falling endlessly into despair.
Your waves receded and carried me with them, paw by broken paw,
until the sand was salt, and I was swimming into open jaws.
You never promised to spare me that devastation.
How can I hate you now?
I truly adore Jane's gift of metaphoric beauty within her poetry! She has crafted a touching and heart grabbing poem here. I was mesmerized from start to finish. Her word display and style is very unique and that is something that in itself draws me to this piece.
Her visual display at the beginning stanza is what blew me away, to then express her feelings and then also give me the unique touch of nature was well crafted. To be drawn in by another soul in such depth as she expresses here is a very deep feeling and when adding metaphors within and throughout, electrifies the message and meaning. Very beautiful poem by Jane this week!
Oh wow!! What a heart-wrenching poem.the extended metaphor is superb,I love how you used the element of water (an ever changing element) to describe your lover, and as the sea appears calm and placid, so people may appear to be something they're not.and the final line, as cutting as it is, rings so beautifully true "you never promised to spare me that devastation, so how can I hate you" this is something that I think most people can relate to in terms of any form of relationship, nobody ever promises to spare you the trauma and devastation that comes with loss, yet we all (most) find ourselves converting our love to hate, but that's a risk we put ourselves in.stunning,I love it :-)
There is a darkness within this write and at the same time a deep seeded hurt keeps floating in every line. The imagery is vivid and it draws the reader into your world from start to finish. A well deserved win! Congrats.