Symptoms

by ASPHYXIATED   Apr 15, 2009


Blinded by these signs of death
we failed to do the math,
for two plus two is always four,
another man-made fact.
"What is a number?" - The question asked,
no answer blessed my tongue,
an illusion of a quantity,
is two plus two not minus one?
"What is a symptom?" - I now must ask,
the answer we swear to know
but in the fear of losing life
ignored these symptoms go.

[Eh, different for me I think.
Most won't get this, but feel free to ask the inspiration.]

2


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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by Italian Stallion

    I thought this was a short but sweet little piece of poetry, that portrayed the aspects of life as a whole. Many "Imagine" the outcome of everyday life while following the same ole' routine without 'experimenting' or taking a different course/road which I felt this piece portrayed well. Mathamatics is a routine practice just like that of life, people have routines and don't usually venture from them, but in this piece of poetry, 'two plus two not minus one?' shows the alternitive thinking in this piece.

    Then again, I can be totally wrong with my interpretation, but that is what I thought it was about. If you'd care to enlighten me if I am wrong, then please PM me, I'd love to know the true meaning behind this piece.

    Well done, keep up the excellent work.

    Peace, Joe

  • 14 years ago

    by Atomic

    "Blinded by these signs of death
    we failed to do the math,
    for two plus two is always four,
    another man-made fact."

    -Really liked the first three lines, but the fourth threw me off. I don't like your use of the word "fact" for some reason.

    ""What is a number?" - The question asked,
    no answer blessed my tongue,
    an illusion of a quantity,
    is two plus two not minus one?"

    -I especially like the second line. The last threw me off a bit, but I think I understand your point. Awesome.

    ""What is a symptom?" - I now must ask,
    the answer we swear to know
    but in the fear of losing life
    ignored these symptoms go."

    -Powerful third line. Last sentence was kind of awkward, but I like it.

    What inspired you, m'dear?

    Great job.

  • 14 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    To me this poem reflects mind over matter

  • 14 years ago

    by Jad

    This was an interesting read and your right I don't quite understand it but a couple of more reads and i might. Over all the rhyme was good and so was the flow. Good job.

  • 14 years ago

    by The Prince

    This was a thought provoking piece and whilst I don't have the time to fully go through it, I'd like to say there were some nice moments. Punctuation was a bit all over the place but I found the message quite profound. Interesting write, I will come back to read it again.
    You could trim it a bit though. Bits like:

    'I now must ask,'

    And the last line could be rephrased too.

    Thanks for the share. :)