Growing up

Time is slipping from
my hands, such that
i can feel the rough grains
roll between my fingers
and pile to the ground.
Walls on all sides seem to
shrink in upon me
and i become ever larger;
larger than life.
My chest presses hard
against my pulsing heart,
tears well in my eyelids,
hope is a dream
and nothing more.

i once felt the footsteps
of a little girl.
i once walked in shoes
smaller than my hands -
i felt the ocean was something that
would seem not so very big
as i got bigger.
i once stood in valleys,
looking up and
wondering,
wishing,
waiting
for my time to grow.

i never knew how sorry i would be
to sit atop a mountain,
looking down upon my youth.
i never knew as time swept
under my feet and on
into the past,
the future would devolve
to a fickler place.
i never knew the ocean was
this big,
nor i this small.

i never knew,
i never knew,
how small and insignificant
i could be.