I Write

by Daniel   Jan 29, 2019


My mother cried
when I was a child;

I’d written a poem
about harpooned whales,
and how their blood
reddened and diluted
our seas;

my teacher hung
it on the wall;

I read it, shaking
at assembly -

I remember people’s
forced applause
when I stammered
“...finished.”

Some part of me,
inherently,
is expectant,
is perpetually
needing approval,

for what I’m
simultaneously
proud of, but
sure is drivel,
and I cannot defeat
the clamour of
hands beating together,
nor comprehend
this paradox,

“Why do you write?”

10


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Latest Comments

  • 6 months ago

    by Ben Pickard

    judging comment

    I believe I have mentioned this in a past comment, but in free verse, I love to see good use of metaphor/imagery/alliteration/personification etc to raise it clearly above prose. In truth, I feel this one borders the line between the two but the formatting and the throwing in of the stanza that ends "...how their blood reddened and diluted our seas" swung it for me in the end, simply because of the power, clarity and innocence that children so often have in their thoughts and comments, as is evident here. But more than that, the brute honesty of the piece is something we would all do well to address: why do we write? Oh, we can all kid ourselves and pretend it doesn't matter what others think, but why, then, do we post here at all? Why not squirrel our work away in a loft somewhere where it is safe from prying eyes? After all, we don't care what others think at all! Or do we? I suppose we can only hope things are written with passion and love and that the content is genuine - then we can post because we are proud of a genuine product. Anyway.. (7)

    • 6 months ago

      by Daniel

      Incredibly thoughtful comment Ben, thanks :)

  • 7 months ago

    by Meena Krish

    Good question and this will have many writers to think
    deeply and widely..well penned and congrats on the win!

  • 7 months ago

    by Michael

    Congratulations fella..
    Just read this and you have written in such raw emotional ink.
    Very well penned M :)

  • 7 months ago

    by - Mr. Darcy

    Well done, Daniel. It's better out than in.

  • 7 months ago

    by Dagmar Wilson

    Congratulations on your win

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