Life Wont Accept Me, Death Wont Let Me In

by Tara   Jul 20, 2005

Despair seeps within me, holding the blade,
Silencing thoughts that make me afraid.
Now blood trickles down from my tainted soul,
Falling fast through a dark, endless hole.
Deep red starts to stain this life I called mine,
Too close to the edge to call it fine.
But this blade is dull, my blood wont flow,
So half a bottle of pills left to go.
Washing it down with a bottle of gin,
Hoping my exit will soon begin.
I lay asleep unconscious, all alone.
Who was I? You wouldn't have known.
I awake the next day, sick as can be.
Why must death keep rejecting me??
The liquor stores full, theres pills all around,
And so many knives to slice pain Ive found.
My knifes gone dull, my pills have expired,
What happened to this girl once admired?
I toss it aside, flush the pills down the drain,
Wake each day tired, and so far from sane.
Still bleeding inside, my face paints a smile,
Although Ive been dead now for quite a while.
Things are never just gonna be okay....
I weep in my pillow, die more every day.
Just one pointless battle that Ill never win -
Life wont accept me, death wont let me in.


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Latest Comments

  • 4 years ago

    by DirgeVenustas

    This was very good. You managed to keep it rhymed throughout. The flow was a little off but I'm guilty of that too. It was simply put and to the the point. Well written. It really captivates a feeling of jadedness, and even numb boredom to the pain. I really enjoyed this.

  • 4 years ago

    by Em

    Tara, this is such a beautifully written piece full of raw emotion and one that many people (including me) can relate as darkness gets to us all at some point in our lives but some deal with it a lot better than others, unfortunately.
    Your words hit me deeply because I have been here all too often.
    "Still bleeding inside, my face paints a smile,
    Although I've been dead now for quite a while.
    Things are never just gonna be okay....
    I weep in my pillow, die more every day."
    These lines hit home a lot more than the rest of the piece.

    Fantastic writing, Em

  • 6 years ago

    by Beautiful Soul

    I really enjoyed this poem because I can really relate. This is a very sad story. The wording again is very nice because you didn't stray at all from what you wamted to say. I can see this poem being about a guy or girl who has had a terrible life. And all they want is to numb the pain they feel. They use anything they are familiar with. I can see this person being riddled with addiction for many years. Life is tough indeed. The ending though is extremely powerful. You are saying that life rejects you and death doesn't want you so you are stuck in a hole of nothingness. Great write

  • 13 years ago

    by Abu3li


  • 13 years ago

    by Angel Of Death

    Wow! this poem is soo good! loved reading it. excellent word choice. this poem is powerful and i could feel the emotion in it! 5/5 keep up the great work.
    xx love