Nothingness of Me

Sitting alone as I shed these tears
Because I’m living in my world of fears
I close my eyes and begin to pray
That no one will ever look this way
I close my eyes and look deep inside
I see the nothingness that tries to hide
But its not possible to hide what’s true
The true colors always shine right through
This nothingness lingers with me every day
Pulling me down with each word that I say
Leaving me dying with each breath that I take
Leaving me lifeless with each cut that I make
And now I find myself gasping for air
Hiding my arms because of the cuts that are there
Turning to drugs as an easy way out
Drowning in smoke, no one hears me shout
And this nothingness is what I’ll forever be
It’s so familiar, it’s now a part of me
A part of me that will never go away
It walks by my side, to forever stay
I’ll let this nothingness drag me down
Unstitch my smile, sow on a frown
Reopen my wounds, let the blood flow
Kill my body, then watch it go
Nothingness is what I’ve learned to be
Look at me… nothingness is what you see
Lock my door and take the key
Don’t let out the nothingness known as me

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