I Can't Go There

by Kaylee   Jul 25, 2006

(I Recall) Reddish blown curtain,
Orange unfolded, Yellow, Brown,
Green swaying to (Nature's Tune)
Necklace drops of mournful rain.

(Deep) Puddles with cold water,
Neglected echo, (Lost) chirping,
Sunlight streaming, fresh, warm,
(I can't go there) Heartbroken.

Somebody said htis needed an ending. In reality it doesn't. The lines talk about a place I knew ad the final line is about how I can never go there again. Read the () words.


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Latest Comments

  • 13 years ago

    by celina

    This poem was so good i liked it a lot
    well good luck with others!!!!!!!

    much love celina

  • 13 years ago

    by Samantha Hollywood

    Kaylee --
    I agree with you ;; this in fact, does not need an ending. I think you wrote this beautifully, wonderful job. The flow was perfect and didn`t seem at all forced. You`re a great writer ;; keep it up! 5/5

    Love Much,
    Samantha Hollywood

  • 13 years ago

    by Kirsty palmer

    Wow.. this peom was so unique, and different it was beautiful, i loved your style of writting, and the brackets made it your own, great write... please read and comment on some of my poems, thanks ...Kirsty Palmer xx

  • 13 years ago

    by sibyllene

    Yeah, i don't think it needs more of an ending - you don't measure the worth of poems by how long they are. yours is unique and original, and well executed. maybe it doesn't fit in a specific style, but who cares? it keeps to its own patterns. that's a cool thing about poetry - rules are there to be broken, eh? : )

  • 13 years ago

    by Darien

    You really did well on this poem. I thought it was creative having those words in brackets. They did stand out, on their own, but together it also held another meaning. Great job this this poem. You described everything so well, it was easy to imagine. I saw the colours best.