Story of my life (how this depression began)

For two months and a half, you wouldn't even look at me
You didn't tell me why and, alone, I couldn't see
One day, I went to ask you what the hell was wrong
You gave me many reasons, to understand, it took me long

You said that I had problems and that we weren't the same
Well, I cannot change that, who am I supposed to blame?
You said that your friends would never want you with me
It's not actually my fault, that you'll never be free

Well, my life is hard, my first depression was at eight
Tried to die, remained alive, i guess, in that age, it's fate
But the scars in my soul, I never succeeded to heal
Still haunted by the past, what am I supposed to feel?

The echo of your voice reminded me of my first tears
With them, came all the memories, suicide thoughts and fears
The second depression came at my early fifteen
You didn't know me well enough and wanted to be mean

Now, you see they'll go away and want to be my friend
What you don't see, right now, is that my life is close to an end
You broke my heart a thousand times, don't want me to be mad
My funeral is near, but I don't want to see you sad

Deep inside, I hate myself but I'll never hate you
The point is I want to die, there's nothing left to do
You had a chance to say "I'm sorry", that chance disappeared
When I fell into disgrace, only for you, I feared