This is beautiful written and so much truth to it. At times when we are going through rough times all we really need is to feel the presence of someone close to us. They don't need to say anything but they sure provide this great comfort.
This poem really took me into one moment in time and really made that moment into a big scene. This is a great talent to have while writing poetry, to be able to show that very small moment, and make it big and vivid for a stranger to understand. It shows an early morning rise of a couple who have not slept because the man's anxiety has filled the room, and his partner is aware there is trouble brewing inside his mind. What I really like about the wording of this poem is that the narration comes from only the female, and yet she makes the poem about her partner and how she understands his silence. We learn about him, through her words and observations. It is a beautiful poem capturing the meaning of love, and how being there is sometimes needed more, than having to do something or say something. A simply precious write.
3 years ago
I really enjoyed this! The intimacy between the narrator and her guy was beautiful!!
I love the simplicity of the poem. It's short but packs a punch. And I think that both really play into the beauty of the poem.
I like the story because it is relatable and you describe it from a woman's standpoint which, in my case, makes it easier to connect with.
Also, the connection between the two characters shows the nature of the relationship, the understanding that each have for each other. I think that is a hard thing to portray through words yet you did it flawlessly.
The last two parts are the selling point for me. It really gets down to the idea of the poem and it reflects that moment when you realize how to help someone. It shows that an emotional connection can be just as good, maybe even better, than words of advice.
It's lovely. Great job.
3 years ago
This piece is amazing so congrats on the well deserved win. I love how even with such a simple piece you managed to write something with such depth, importance and personality. The way you decided to tell this story is wonderful and a beautiful combination of style and your own voice so wonderful job with that. this is the kind of piece that people can always relate to one day, whether its a friend, sibling, or love everyone gets their chance to be needed loved and comforting. the final two stanzas completely blew me away, the way they wrapped everything up without giving too much detail was beautiful.