by Maple Tree   Jun 20, 2017

To have a lump
lodged deep within my throat
keeps me silent,
because I'm dying inside
and there is nothing
anyone can do.

while driving to work,
walking in -
only to hear about how
wonderful my co-workers
children are.

I share a smile for their joy
while withering away inside.

I've got nothing to give.

There is a depth to my sadness
and I just want to die.

Within my poetry lies a truth
that many are afraid to share....

Not this lady.

I am naked within each stanza,
this sorrow of mine needs to be written;
I'm watching the addiction consume
my first born,
and I can't stand this agony any longer....

I just can't.


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Latest Comments

  • 1 year ago

    by Meena Krish

    Judging Comment:

    This will completely break any mother’s heart and from one
    mother to another I can understand and wish there was more
    that can be done to ease the pain. To be able to write this
    heart wrenching agony is not easy yet the author has done
    it revealing her vulnerability, her emptiness the heavy
    sadness of seeing and sharing in the smiles of other mothers
    who talk about their children while she screams for her child
    who is lost to addiction. No words, no comfort and no amount
    of points given can replace or give this mother’s heart comfort.

  • 1 year ago

    by Ren

    "I am naked within each stanza,
    this sorrow of mine needs to be written;
    I'm watching the addiction consume
    my first born,
    and I can't stand this agony any longer....

    I just can't."
    These words are absolutely heartbreaking and hit too close to home for me. Like Em said, this write is so raw and full of so much emotion. I am in tears.

    This is such a heart-wrenchingly sad write...and it absolutely breaks my heart to read. I have watched the horrendous and greedy hands of addiction grasp my loved ones and completely take them over. I will not say I know your pain...because everyone's pain is different. But I can empathize with you and the absolute heartbreak and helplessness watching a loved one go through this can bring. I am so so sorry for your pain and suffering, and for your child's as well. Some days are harder than others. But they never seem to get any easier. I wish there was more I could say to bring you any sort of comfort. But I understand how some wounds just can't be healed, no matter how scarred over. I hope one day things will turn around and work out for the better. Sometimes all we can do is take it one day at a time...and keep putting one foot in front of the other. So much love and strength and healing to you, Andrea <3

  • 1 year ago

    by Em

    I have no words other than I had to nominate this because it's so raw and full of emotions which shine throughout. Sorry but i I just hope to make you smile even if a little: sometimes you just have to smile and wave, smile and wave (Madagascar)

    Em </3

    • 1 year ago

      by Em

      Sorry it's not very appropriate reading it back Andrea was just trying to raise your spirits. It's different but I lost a little boy and he would have 6 last week and a co worker of mine had a little boy a few days before and she always talks about him - his achievements etc. I think in her way she's trying to help but just doesnt and I know because of the people we are we smile and are happy for them in that moment, it's thinking about it even a second afterwards that hurts. Much love xxx

  • 1 year ago

    by mossgirl19

    My...dear Ms. Maple, this is a beautiful piece that is heart-wrecking all the way. The toll of addiction is evident and the sadness you have... it tears me. Sending much love and strength to you.

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