by IdTakeABulletForYou   Jul 12, 2018

I know you'll never say it:
those dreaded words, "Me too",
but I just want, though years have passed,
to say sorry to you.

In truth, I crossed a line that day,
a line I'd never seen.
That crossing cost you from my life,
a price beyond my means.

I've played it over many times,
no pleasure gained, just pain;
From whence my love and happiness
is only ever feigned.

How was I supposed to know
since you did not dissent?
I was so new to being gay
I knew not how it went.

I took a risk and in I wade,
but found I was too deep.
The love I'd hoped was blossoming
swept from under my feet.

I wonder if you're as ruined
as I am to this day.
Perhaps you suffer, just as I,
though in a different way.

I try to view from where you laid
to see where I went wrong;
perhaps that moment showed a sign
that I'd missed all along.

A sign that friends, but nothing more,
sleep naked in one room...
That I could rest upon your lap
unclothed as in a womb.

My hand outstretched onto your skin
and there lay my mistake.
I can't untouch, I can't unsee,
I can't ever unbreak.

It wasn't until afterward
your fury reared its head.
You stormed off toward the rising sun...
We never spoke again.

In truth: I fell for you like rain
-- a storm relentless, still.
I know that you could say, "Me too"
but that you never will.



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Latest Comments

  • 11 hours ago

    by C Cattaway

    Beautifully relayed. A mistake, yes. A regret? No. We should only ever regret the things we haven't done, not the things we have. Every experience is an experience. Every moment is a made decision. I feel for you, living with this pain. But your story is all the better for it. May that be your silver lining.
    Much love,
    Catherine x

  • 3 days ago

    by Michael


    An open and honest piece, with a great rhyming scheme. A story that tells of your emotions, and very personal.
    Really enjoyed this
    Michael :)

  • 4 days ago

    by Brenda

    Stephen, welcome back! Thank you for sharing this. I know this is deeply personal for you and those things that never really leave a person. Hugs to you and I hope you are well?

  • 4 days ago

    by - Mr. Darcy

    I liked this a lot; not just for the good meter and rhyme, but for the willingness to share.
    I hope you do well in the contest.
    Take care.

    • 4 days ago

      by IdTakeABulletForYou

      Thank you, Mr. Darcy. It is hard to put decade-old emotions into words, especially such sensitive ones, and I'm honored that you liked it.

      Thank you kindly for reading it!


  • 4 days ago

    by deeplydesturbed

    Ill come back and comment..

    S this is both heart breaking yet eye opening.. to feel this way for such a long period of time.
    To have this eating at your soul.. im sorry.

    Eye opening because often we hear about how someone has been on the receiving end - not the giving end.. even if it was an honest mistake..

    Im glad your writing again. Truely. Ive missed your style and brutal honesty.. and thankyou for sharing.. it must have been difficult

    I am pleased youve gotten a little out. And hope one day you get your answers.

    Much love S

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