Girls can fake orgasms but Guys can fake whole F*!$ing relationships

"Dont think of yourself as an ugly human... just a beautiful monkey!!"
ha ha i call my boufriend monkey...lol

BOY-can i have your number?
GIRL-yea
BOY-ok...well wat is it??
GIRL-o it in the phone book
BOY-yea but i dont no your name
GIRL-o dont worry its there too!

wow i just thought that was so funny!

Treat your friends like your family, and treat your enemies like your significant others family

You know I got Fatter When I knew You still love me..

I'm bothering you? Well no what your face is bothering me you don't see me complaining!!!

HE bROkE MY hEaRT..... SO i bROkE hiS JaW... :)

~*~DoN't Be TrIpPiN' wRaP uR cHiCkEn!!!!!~*~

Falling doesn't hurt as bad if someone catches you before you hit the ground

Wrap your snake before you play in the garden.

Don't ask...my boyfriend made that up...lol ..so that explains that...