Teacher: Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?!
Me: No, just guys that I wanna call "daddy".

I can't help you right now, my legs are in the air.

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Im secretly in love,
but not with you!

User, n. The word computer professionals use when they mean "idiot."

"What's Walmart, do they sell like wall stuff?"
Paris Hilton

"You can only be young once. But you can always be immature."

I taught your boyfriend that thing you like.

You're probably just as fake
As the lies that you spread.

Everytime I see an Ugly Couple .. it gives me hope that there's someone out there for me.

Me, "Seeee, I wear the pants in this relationship".
Him, "No you don't".
Me, "Yeah you're right. You wear the pants and I control the zipper!".