If you cant laugh at yourself, I'll be glad to do it for you!

Sometimes I think I'm the only sane people left in the world.

Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.
--Steven Wright

Why are freeways really expensive to build and highways really close to the ground?

again, from my friend Stephen

Just tell Nemo you couldn't find him cuz you were getting stonned. He'll understand.
[r-e-s-p-o-n-s-a-b-i-l-i-t-y]
my anti_drug

They've found something that can do the work of 10 men.....

a woman

Smile, it makes people wonder what you're up too..

When cows laugh, does milk come out of their nose?

~*~It's not illegal until you get caught!!!!~*~

My father always said that there is no such thing as spontaneous combustion, you must set yourself on fire. I also found that other people are generally upset when I set them on fire.