The scented veil of humanity ( collab )

by Finalgravedigger   Jun 11, 2008


A bearded sage equals a thousand year old tree
from their tall canopy the immeasurable world they see.
Deep sunken roots reveal man's poor written past.
Leafs and quick ideas shrivel and never last.

The trunk stands them tall with power,
as the leaves crumble and fall to the ground,
but still stands with grace and might,
as next spring new buds are easily found.

Sadly many die off due to human immorality.
Not even a sole one out of a million can fight reality.
However over more generations a few grow.
But compared to countless drones the wise are slow.

They stand brave behind the mindless sprouts,
but go unnoticed by the passing eyes,
the minds stifled beneath society's sun,
as the thinkers wilt beneath the skies.

As blossoms of physical attraction and sin arise
Intellects and deeper meanings are despised
Outcast and the wise remain hidden in pain
For none can stop the weed of the inhumane.

Collab written with Ashleigh Skye
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/author.html?id=42932

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  • 15 years ago

    by BREEawNUHH

    I liked this. It was well written, and I liked the rhyming.

    "A bearded sage equals a thousand year old tree
    from their tall canopy the immeasurable world they see.
    Deep sunken roots reveal man's poor written past.
    Leafs and quick ideas shrivel and never last."

    ^^ "Leafs" should be "leaves".

    Other than that, it's very good. I also liked the word choice. Made imagery possible. :]

    5/5

    -Briana

  • 15 years ago

    by Amaranthine

    I luv the flow, emotion and word choice in this poem. its really great . your an awsome deep writer =]

  • 15 years ago

    by LadyPearl

    Wow, I'm blown away. I usually don't enjoy rhyming poems because of the unnatural emotions behind the rhymes but this poem is awesome. I especially like the topic and how instead simply writing out the problems directly, you take a poetic direction and use natural images and comparisons to strengthen the whole concept. Great job

  • 15 years ago

    by Shellaine shelli

    Wow, that was really deep and your use of words was brilliant, the name drew me in and I am so glad that I read this poem!! it is amazing!! WEll donE!!

  • 15 years ago

    by Freedom

    Poem is deep :) minds are clever,mature,serious.words are nice (well i feel shame that one word i couldnt understand in the poem..bad english :( ... )
    all in all this is a nice poem and the most thing i like on it,it is serious way of looking into nowadays life :) well done