Completeness...

by Dreamofolwin   Jul 27, 2009


I lie awake and think of you...
My thoughts are deep and longing too,
To see you smile... to touch your face,
To hold you close in my embrace.

To feel your warmth for just a while,
Making everything worthwhile...
With you my fears I can erase,
And everything falls into place.

Two hearts now knit we have become,
Our souls united feeling one...
Perfect completeness you and I,
I'll love you till the day I die.

**********************************************
P.S.
(I wasn't sure if to put "so" / "seem" worthwhile in the second stanza or just leave it as it is... Help appreciated lol. )

Olwin.

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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    You've captured true love in this poem perfectly. The feeling of having them always on your mind, feeling as though youre one, having your fears subside when youre with them, everything falling into place, that sense of 'completeness' with them in your life, loving them til the day you die. There's so much more one can say to describe true love--it's such a strong feeling. Theres something someone told me a while back and it's something so true, someone doesn't necessary complete you yet--their love should compliment yours. I thought that was neat and nonethless the truth. [I hope that all made sense, lol] Well done, this was beautiful! [:

  • 14 years ago

    by TJ Arizona Eagle

    Such tender emotions not ruined with metaphors or words that have to be thought out. Your to the point in wonderfully flowing words.
    I really enjoy your style

  • 14 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Leave it as it is. I like the simplicity of this
    poem for they are heartfelt words of love.
    The last line of the final vesr you have a
    typo "I'ill"
    Take care

  • 14 years ago

    by junet

    Its nice and simple...

  • 14 years ago

    by Jay Perry Jr

    I like it the way it is. I love this poem

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