In the mirror

I can’t remember what changed inside me
When I began to hate what I saw
I know there was not a defining moment
It just happened one day
In that reflection I saw the ugliness in my soul
In saw everything inside that I hated
And in the mirror I began to despise
What I had started to become
Something that is broken, dirty and tainted
Something lost and alone
Yet the only person who has not let me down
My reflection that should be my best friend
Has become my enemy
The reason that people look at me
Pity in their eyes
For what I have become
A mass of sewn together cuts and pain
And its all because of you Granddad
You and your touch
I cannot see the grown up I’ve become
I can only see a frightened little girl
Facing her eyes away from you
Staring at the patterns on the wall
Something so dark
That I don't ever think I will see light again
And in my reflection I can see the patterns
I can see the imprint of the sofa on my face
The cuts that hold my fragile soul together
And the hurt that I cause when I hit out
You made me despise the mirror Granddad
You made me despise myself
You made me rip out the eyes of my toys
Because they had seen and they knew our secret
I hate you for that
Yet I loved your laugh
But as I look in the mirror
I can’t hear it anymore