Hope is a lying b***h

You'd think if I've been down this road
I'd know which way to turn
That I'd know where the paths would lead
And the heartbreak in return

When I find something that makes me happy
I'm just waiting for it to end
So I kill it before it has the chance
To put my heart back on the mend

And when I find something that hurts me
I cling onto for dear life
What is so deeply wrong with me?
That if I could be happy, I have to fight?

I always thought love made you strong
To fight the demons away
Instead it seems, to invite them in
And give them a place to stay

It seems more of an addiction
Is it really you I love?
Do I even want to tell you?
Why haven't I had enough!

My face doesn't show what I'm thinking
Make-up is a wonderful thing
You think I resemble a china doll
But to me
I'm the clown trapped inside the ring